It Gets Better!

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do

In your lifetime there will be those who may never believe in you. What hurts the most is these same people are the people who you may desire to be proud of you, those of who you look up to and who you seek approval from. Sometimes the people who don't believe in you will be people you don't even know, just looking for someone to criticize. Whatever the case may be, it is important to note that not everyone will agree with the things that you are doing.

but its ok All my life i wanted someone to believe in me when all this time I really needed to believe in my self  Im facing some of the biggest hurdles right now more than ever but I know God will never leave me

During our lives we will see a lot of pain, and we will see a lot of struggle during our times of growth, and times of change. I'm not saying that we should make an effort to enjoy the pain that we are or will go through, but we should always make an effort to go through it. The pain that we do experience, will be an experience that we will most likely remember for the rest of our lives, and it can be used to fuel the adventures you will take upon further in your life. With no pain, there will be limited to no amounts of gain .In our lives as most of us already have experienced, we must embrace challenges put before us, because they are an inevitable portion of life itself    Without tests in life we would never know what strengths and weaknesses we have, and without challenges in life everyone would be lackadaisical and without a care in the world. There would be no use for goals or accomplishments, as easy as everything would come to everybody. I thank GOD for it all.

Right Where I needed to be.

I HAVE BEEN LOOKING HERE AND THERE I WENT TO THE DSS TO SEE IF THEY CAN HELP BUT IT WAS A NO GO. BUT THE CHURCH HAS HELPED WITH A DINNER TABLE VERY THANKFUL FOR THAT. IT JUST ALL SEEMS SO UNREAL!

Certain situations arise in life in which things can not be fixed, and need to be started over. Though giving up on a life into which you put your all into may be one the hardest things to do (if it's not the hardest), it may also be the most beneficial choice. Starting a new life happens everyday to people who split up, get divorced, go bankrupt, lose jobs, end up homeless, lose close loved ones and many other difficult scenarios. This is my blog any my story.... FRIDAY 8/10/2012  Even though many of us would like to forget about some of the things that we have endured in the past, and some of the mistakes that we have committed, we have to believe that everything that we have been through, is a part of who we are today. Every situation you have encountered has helped to form who you are in this moment, and the only way that you can change who you are now, is to work on yourself as each day comes. And I hope and pray that when you read this blog you can better understand who iam and not look down on me.

People sometimes ask me why do I share so much of my life? or they say I should be ashamed but

Living life ashamed of who you are is a very difficult life to live. Instead of being ashamed of where you have been and what you have been through, be grateful. You are blessed to still have life, you were blessed with the gift of waking up this morning, and you have a chance to make your life better. Not everyone was given this tremendous gift of life this day, and the next minute in our life isn't promised, just as the next day isn't promised

Thank God For Our New House-Single mother finds hope

It has been a real Blessing for me and my little girl to have a place that we call home. We are so very happy we will be moving in Next Friday! OH yEAH... (in my peter pan voice)
thanks for the many prayers to all who have been reading my blog GOD BLESS YOU ALL!


We stilll have a lot of things that we don't have but I thank God That we have each Other















It’s The Lord That Builds Your Home
God's love is what makes a house
A home where you can live
And His love is the foundation
And the tool He builds with

Let Him be the one who builds
Your house to be a place
Where others find the warmth of love
And acceptance by His grace

For when you try to build your home
With what you know won’t last
You may end up building your future
From the surplus of your past

But see this as a new beginning
A new life to pursue
A fresh new start and future hope
That God has given you

© By M.S.Lowndes

IT HAS BEEN A LONG TIME

 Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds you plant I have found that if you love life, life will love you back BUT IF YOU HATE IT- WELL YOU KNOW WHAT IM SAYING...

FYI The Missing Links

The Missing Links

It’s been a journey like none other. The best decision I EVER Made in my life was asking Jesus to come into my life In spite of my tears, disappointments, hurt and pain God has kept me in the mist of it all. So of you may read this blog and really not understand it. Well it's my life and I’m 35 years old and still don't understand it. So let me make something’s clear for you. I have 4 kids. If you keep reading the blog post thing will pan out. Some things that I blog about are from my childhood. My life has been one crazy ride. You just have to follow the story, most of you may not believe the things in this blog but they are all true. So just to get you up to date on what’s going on I moved to New Bern in the spring of 2001 after having no contact with my mother for over 8+ years. Because of our horrid pass I didn’t want anything to do with her. I came here seeking a safe place I was running from a bad relationship. Thinking I was doing the right thing by coming here. My mother and her Boyfriend lived here(HIS JOB MOVED THEM HERE --CHERRYPOINT BASE ) They said that I could come here to stay until I could get on my feet.--- Well I was with child at the time I had money saved so when I got here I stayed with them until I found a place of my own. I moved to a nice little place in the heart of downtown New Bern. I lived there for about 2years until the house was sold by the owner and the new owners did not want to rent it out any more. I ended up moving back in with my mother and her boyfriend (NOW HER HUSBAND) I live there for about 6-7mo. after that I moved out me and my little girl. I started seeing someone who also had a child around the same age as mine, so it only made things better and it really seem to work out. We stayed together for 8 years. We moved in together and raised our kids together. We both worked hard and things were great. We would take camping trips always doing something with the kids life was really good. We opened a small business. Things couldn't get any better. In 2010 my mother husband (MY STEP FATHER) started to lose his eye sight and so he could not drive anymore and so I stated running errands for them taking him to the doctor’s appointment etc. At the same time the person that I was with for 8 years Mother started to fall ill. So we were both helping our parents out a lot. Work was put on the back burner we had money saved to cover our bills but we needed to take care of our parents now. Things seem to get harder in 2011 I had a heart attack. And was told I had high blood pressure. Then things seem to really start to fall apart...

I was 13 when I got pregnant

Teen pregnancy is considered to be a epidemic in the United States. About $18 billion is spent each year in the United States on resources to help pregnant teens receive medical care as well as assistance for raising their children.  
April 1989

I was 13 when I got pregnant by a 15 year old.They talked about Unplanned Pregnancy in school, but this was real life and I had no one too talk to. I didn't know how to tell my mother. She already didn't love me so this was hard. Just getting over a broken leg, and now this, Life for me just got harder.--- The way I felt was.... that she was really going to kill me. I was so scared! in the early 90's it was no such thing as a teen mom, All that stuff was hush hush. I wanted to runaway now more than anything, But maybe the baby will keep her from beating me, maybe she wont hurt me, this time. I must really be crazy if I think a baby is going to stop her. So I did the only thing that I could do. I went to school and told my teacher. I felt like if the teacher knew about me and what was going on she could help me if my mom killed me and the baby. So I did just that i went to school and I told! they sent me to the office, OK this is it I'm thinking....... nothing is in my head at this time just a buzzzzzzing sound man it seem like yesterday, I talked to the school case worker and she told me she had to call my mother.

So it was done she call to see if anyone was home and lo and behold my mom picked up the phone the case worker told her that she needed to do a home visit. By this time my mom is flipping out on the phone thinking whats going on what did I say.. Did I tell about the Beatings? Did I tell about the rape? I could hear her yelling on the phone. We pull up in the drive way and my mom is standing outside smoking. She starts yelling as soon as we exit the car SHARON! what have you done now. The case worker is telling her to pls stop yelling, can we go inside ms Thomas as we enter the house, the smell of sex and smoke are in the air. So what the hell do you want my mother ask the case worker. This B*tcH is always doing something. what is it now?

The case worker tells her Sharon is in no trouble, she is doing really good in school. But my mom would not know that, she never looked at my report card never came to any PTA meeting never helped with home work. Due to the fact that she couldn't read she never even wanted to attend any meeting at school with any teachers. So the case work tells her about the support classes that have at DSS for young girls like myself, and my mom by this time is just really getting upset OK what the hell is this all about. Well

 ms Thomas Sharon came into my office today and told me she thinks she might be pregnant. Oh yeah my mom says well she has to get out of my house I hope the school or DSS got a place to put her and the baby cause they are not welcome here. The case worker by this time is trying to talk things over. But my mom is far from hearing what she has to say, So she tell me and the case worker to get the HELL OUT! TAKE HER WITH YOU I DON'T WANT HER HERE ANY MORE......

　

　

　

　

Teen birth rates increased in 2006 and 2007, following large declines from 1991-2005.

FOR THE UNDERGROUND YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

        Questions   and   Answers

 I NEVER refuse assistance from ANYONE

West ask:

Q: How do you have time or money to scrapbook if you are so desperate?

A: I have not been homeless all my life, Before when I had a place I would Take some time to do arts & crafts. with my little girl.

TO WEST: ---- (YOU SAY I SAID)She said she needs more than just someone offering a charity and a temporary stay.

Yes I did that letter is to a Homeless shelter in the area. They only offer a 30 day stay after that your back out on the streets. I said we need more in terms of Counseling Services ,They don't offer One on One services to break the cycle of dependence.( To keep the homeless from coming back to the shelter) Most of the woman and kids in the shelters end up back in the shelter-- They become dependent of the shelter and not SELF DEPENDENT !   I DON'T WANT TO END UP LIKE THAT!

TO Boobsy :  Im not crying at all   Because I know that others in my case would have lost thier mind if thEY had to live 1year in my shoes --- God's grace and mercy brought me this far. And it's by His grace I'm goin all the way. This road has not been easy. He never said it would be. Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding---- Psalm 27:10 When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.--- BOOBSY I'm sorry for your situation as well I will pray for you.

TO WEST: ( YOU SAY ) I have emailed people about buying things, Yes I have. I had a mini laptop for sale and a few more things and they are all sold. So because Im homeless i can't sell anything---- I never told anyone I would meet with them and then did not show up! ( SO NOT TRUE )
 WEST ASK:  Q: how are you finding time to be on a computer after hours?
                            A:  We are staying with some one who has the net. and because I go to school online.


Q: Pizza delivery to Cherry Branch?  A: NOPE NO ME WRONG PERSON SORRY!

TO: IKICKPICKLES
I have not been in ANY HOMELESS SHELTER NONE! GET IT ! GOOD.... My child with close relatives or in foster care did you read the blog? yes its a lot missing from the blog but like I said this is healing for me just to get all this stuff out in the air. We all have been hurt in one way or another but when it all come down too it what do you have when its all over? ---- well let me tell you I have a man that will never leave me nor forsake me and a little girl that thinks the word of me no mater what. so why would I not do my very best to take care of her. she eats every night takes a bath and goes to school Im here mother I had her And i will die trying my best to make sure she not hurt by people like you...... Its people like you that make this world a mean and ugly place to wake up too each day BUT I KNOW A GOD THAT SITS HIGH AND LOOKS LOW AND HE HAS ALL POWER IN HIS HANDS......  I HOPE THAT YOU ARE NEVER IN A PLACE AND NEED SOME ONE HELP.... AND IF YOU ARE I PRAY THE EACH AND EVERY PERSON SHOWS YOU MERCY






 

TO ALL THE HATEFULL PEOPLE---YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE

Yes we’ve all been conditioned to judge and be critical of things around us.  We all judge others. Their actions, choices, behaviors.  The first step in not judging others is to simply stop voicing it. This is usually the hurtful part and if you can learn to keep judging comments to yourself, you can quickly eliminate any hurt you are causing to others directly. Verbal attacks, sarcasm, snide jokes don't help, it only makes it harder to know that people can be so heartless. --If your heart is starting to nurture bad feelings against someone, if your mind is trying to tempt you into judging a person, try to crush these feelings. If you can’t crush them, at least hold your tongue and don’t spread it out to more people. If you keep it within yourself, the results are limited by the borders of your heart, but if you tell other people what you think, the effects are devastating. The old saying, "If you don’t have anything nice to say, then don’t say anything!" is a perfect thing to apply here in this blog. Having a judging mindset still leaves that negativity built up inside you.  Offering some help or assistance to someone in an area they are not excelling at, will be far more useful than telling them how poorly they are doing or by telling them how wrong they are. Look for ways to change the situation for the better. Wouldn’t you prefer an offer of help over an insult in an area you have not mastered? And life is something that none of us have mastered. We all make mistakes.

 

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and let it come in – Morrie Schwart

 

 

 

Abuse by Mother (A look at my Childhood)

The effect   of   emotional    abuse by mother   has been a life-lasting and lingering hurt that hunts me to this day. Excessive criticism by my mother caused me to have low self-esteem   through adolescence and early adulthood I developed a very sensitive and self-conscious outlook on life. I could not rely on my mother for love and protection If she wasn’t hurting me then it was one of her many boyfriends.  I was so hard for me to understand why she would hurt me, as a child I want to just run as far away as I could. And end the nightmare that I call my life. I was raised by mother Aunt and Uncle until I was 8 or 9 years of age. My mother was in prison and could not take care of me. And when she was released from prison I went to live with her. Things seem too been fine for a few years but by the time I was 10years old that’s when it all seemed unreal. My mother has never had a job in her life and never finished school. She could not read or even write her name, I taught her how when I was 11 years old. It was really hard for me as a child, she would sell her body to get money to pay bills and the lights and water would still somehow always be off. She would take me with her at night when she walks to streets looking for men to pay her for sex. I would sit in the car outside motel rooms sometimes in the cold waiting for her to come out. And if I was nice and didn’t talk or ask any questions she would buy me some candy on the way back home.  I remember nights on the sofa at my Aunts house crying wondering if I was going to ever see her again. She would always tell me one day she was going to runaway and never come back because she hated me so. It’s been only by the grace of God that I can let go of the pain. And yet sometime I feel like it’s still a part of me. I had to Work toward forgiving my mother, but I could not allow her to hurt my child the way she hurt me, that’s why I had to leave and this is the reason for me being homeless.

To The Readers

It’s hard to argue against someone’s personal experience and I have had my share of hard times. But I want to share my testimonies of God's goodness and grace in this blog. God has brought me through every trial and tribulation. And Im not done yet. God has a plan for my life and I want each reader to be a part of the experience. I just have to live it out and tell it.  I want YOU the reader to Be inspired. By the transformation of someone like me. And to be encourage.

Jeremiah 29:11"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope

2 Corinthians 4:16-18Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal

Thanks for reading be blessed

Each Step Matters You can Make A Change

         You have not lived until you have done something for someone who can never repay you


 The nation’s homeless population decreased 1 percent from 643,067 in 2009 to 636,017 in 2011. While this is positive, homelessness remains an ongoing issue that affects every community. With targeted investments in effective programs, homelessness is a problem that can be solved.

Top Reasons that Lead to Homelessness:

• Unforeseen economic crisis
• Job loss
• Foreclosure
• Serious medical condition
• Death in the family
• Just to name a few

Ways You Can Help the Homeless, Understand Who the Homeless Are. Respond with Kindness

Give Money - One of the most direct ways to aid the homeless is to give money. Donations to nonprofit organizations that serve the homeless go a long way. Find one that's right for you in our Homeless category.
Give Clothing - Next time you do your spring or fall cleaning, keep an eye out for those clothes that you no longer wear. If these items are in good shape, gather them together and donate them to organizations that provide housing for the homeless. You can also check our list of organizations that accept donated goods.
 Give Toys - Children living in shelters have few possessions --if any-- including toys. Homeless parents have more urgent demands on what little money they have, such as food and clothing. So often these children have nothing to play with and little to occupy their time. You can donate toys, books, and games to family shelters to distribute to homeless children.

In need of a Christmas Miracle (A LOOK BACK AT 2011)

I did not have the money for X-mas 2011 and I found a Christmas Miracle here are some of the emails from the peoplel who help make 2011 a very Merry  Christmas. Thank you all!  Some of the emails made me cry, They touch me so much


 Hans From Newbern  writes:

 Hello Sharon.

 My thoughts & Prayers for you & your children. "If God sees you to it, He will see you through it." Things will work out &, in the end, you will find that you are an even stronger person, having gone through these difficult times.

At the bottom of this email, I am going to send you the name of a group, out of Beulaville. I don't know exactly how it works, but, it may be something for you to look into. I am not affiliated with them, in any way. However, over the years, I have heard many, many stories about the good things that they do, especially during the holidays & Christmas. Hopefully, they will be able to assist you as well.

May God Bless you & your children. Merry Christmas!

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David for jacksonville writes

Hello, I unfortunately don't have the means to help you out, but have you talked to any local churches? They can sometimes help with food, gifts & sometimes even money. Don't give up, also keep an eye out at your local thrift shops. I have found several Christmas gifts for very cheap, clothes for $1 and books and toys for as low as .25 cents. Good luck, I hope you get your Christmas miracle.

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Lovejoy from Newbern writes:

Hi I am also umemployed mother of two kids...You seem as if you are truely serious and telling the truth. I can not get ur girls exactly wat they want r would like but through the grace of GOD I would like to get them something. Im unsure what it will be....what are their shoes or clothes...if you are interesting in use items if i cum across sumthing....But i will try to get them sumthing....once again im unemployed so it wnt be anything big...GOD BLESS YALL!!!
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Kim27 from jacksonville writes:

God will Provide.... it may not be what you want, but He will give you what you NEED. I will admit: I read your list previously and was sadden by the "wants." I totally understand your situtation. Like you, I am a single mom of 3. My home was foreclosed on earlier this year, and I struggle to make ends meet. Through this "wild ride," God has shown me mercy and grace. I have realized that He gives you what you need, not necessarily what you want. Continue to glorify Him in all you do and say, and He will provide. Be the best mom you can be by listening to your children, spending quality time with them, feeding them, and providing them with shelter. I have clothing for girls that I will provide to you, if you are able to come get them :) Merry CHRISTmas.

Putting My life Back Together

Homeless families and kids constitute an estimated 45 percent of the national homeless population, and with the economic downturn, the numbers are growing daily. Me and my child are a part of the growing number, Hello--- And Welcome to my life- Im Sharon 35 year old single mother and this is our story
Transitioning from crisis to self-sustainability won't be easy BUT.... Philippians 4:13 (SAYS)
I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me
　

Putting my life back together

life has been difficult for us to digest. But I refuse to throw my hands in the air and give up. Finding and keeping a job has become even more challenging with the current economic conditions. My vision for my life: self-sufficiency, in addition to a sense of self-worth and pride, through employment. Long term goal: to become a independent and positive contributor to my community. And Empower others like myself who ARE HURTING AND HOMELESS.

PLEASE KEEP US IN YOUR PRAYERS.
　
　
　
　

　
　
　
　

To Whom it may Concern

May 2012

To whom it May Concern



My child and I are victims of abuse, both physically, mentally, and verbally abused by my mother.  who were living with before having no place to go. We need far more than just shelter & charity   struggling against poverty. In addition to needing stable & safe shelter, to transition successfully out of homelessness and poverty we need a wide range of support services to address our mental and physical health due to years of   abuse .Being homeless is perhaps hardest on my little girl even more than myself   she needs   to feel safe and secure, so that she can concentrate in school, In short need everything you take for granted, I would like to become self-sufficient. For my child and I But don’t have the resources to do so. The instability has caused me to lose jobs and my child to miss days from school. This isn't the life I imagined for my child at all. She may understand why we are stuck but that won't stop the hurt or embarrassment she feels. I have learned not to get too comfortable in any one place. Even if friends offer a place to stay, they cannot guarantee how long we can stay especially if they have a landlord. I do everything I can not to be noticed. So we live out of a dufflebag and carry only what is necessary I   represent   a growing number of homeless single mothers in North Carolina.  Homelessness is one of our nation's most serious social problems. While it is often the result of interwoven systemic and personal problems, the primary cause of homelessness among families is the growing gap between housing costs and income. The state of North Carolina received   $ 29,078,387  for  homeless prevention  and rapid rehousing"  money from federal stimulus   and still this problem is a growing epidemic. I  didn’t  come forward because I was embarrassed and scared that my child would be removed by the Human Services Department. But I can no longer hide and pretend that this problem is just going to go away because it’s not and that’s the reason for this letter.  We need help and   compassion I have no place left to turn.